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Mahesh Hegade's Blog
Friday, 23 June 2006
Egg to Omleette while preserving egg shells!
Topic: Quotable Quotes
"You have to break a few eggs to make an omlette."

If our end goal is to make an omlette, then by focusing on that goal, we realize that if necessary we can make an omlette with least breakage to eggs. We have seen people doing intricate artwork on egg shells. How they do it? They make a smallest hole needed to get the contents out of the egg shell, dry it and seal it back to prepare the egg shell for artwork. The contents removed can be used to make omlettes or cakes or whatever needs egg content (yolk and white).
Above mentioned quotation is a way of saying that you need to harm (or sacrifice) some people or things if you need to achieve something useful. It may be true. But, if preserving egg shells is also a concern along with the goal of making omlettes, then by being little careful, considerate and ingenious, we can achieve the goal and address the concern.

Do we have to alienate people just because we are trying to achieve something? Say, a project. Every project goes thru tough stages. Do you need to break eggs (people and relationships) to get the project done (make omlette)? Egg shells may be disposable but people are not. As we can extract contents of an egg by carefully making a hole, we can similarly extract best out of people by being careful and sensitive to their needs and emotions. This is not exploitation. It is what is called true motivation. It is the art of making people do what you want them to do. By creating such motivation, you let people want to do it and there is no other way to get the best out of people.

When we can ignore the rule and break some eggs? Actually, to make a good omlette, you need to separate rotten eggs from good eggs. Once you have identified rotten eggs, it does not matter what you do with them. Anyway you have to dispose them off. It is up to you how less of a mess you want to create when disposing rotten eggs. Applying this to people and projects, it is unfortunate that some of your people have become rotten eggs. It may be due to you or due to factors beyond your control. Nevertheless, in order to reduce the stink from rotten eggs, you need to get rid of them ASAP if you want good eggs to last and if you want to enjoy the omlette in a stink free environment. This is to say that you have to get rid of people who are not working out despite your best intentions and despite your having made all the facilities available. They may be successful elsewhere and not with you and your place. Now comes the question of getting rid of the rotten eggs with least mess. If you are not careful, you may drop an egg or two during the disposal. If that happens, it is a big mess. Stinks bad. This is to say that if you do not get rid of your problem people carefully, legally and in a humanitarian way, you are going to have a lots and lots of problems. How do we avoid that? We need to have a good system of performance management for everyone for whose work we are responsible from the beginning. Keep good records. Manage performance continuously. Performance management serves two purposes. It helps you to improve the performance if the person is receptive and cooperative. On the other hand, it lets you get rid of the person correctly as the documentation required to terminate a person is nothing more than what you capture during continuous performance management process.

Terminating people, working on performance problems are last things we all want to worry about. Isn't life challenging as such without these unwanted distractions? Yes, but life does throw curve balls once in a while and we need to be able to deal with them. Just make sure that all your people interactions are compassionate, human and worth emulating.

If you have to make omlettes and if you have good eggs, do not break them to make omlettes. Just extract the contents and use shells for good use. If you have some rotten eggs, dispose them off gently without creating a mess which you would regret later. One last time to repeat, motivate people to want to do what you need them to do. Get rid of people who are not working out and make it a win-win for both. Chances are you and your non-working people were never meant to be together.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 7:17 PM EDT
Memory malady
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it." - by Michel de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)

Is it not common that we think more about things (or people) we dislike, fear, hate? It is hardly once in a blue moon we remember people who we like so much. Even this remembrance starts with some bitter incident and suddenly we remember this person we like so much and how s/he had acted in the past which had made similar bitter situation whole lot better.

By thinking more and more about things that we wish to forget, we drive it deep into the subconscious. Once a thing gets into subconscious it lives there for a long time. It is also hard to take out. What is the purpose of subconscious? Subconscious exists as an area to store all that we can not deal at the moment. When something becomes overwhelming for the conscious, it simply pushes it into subconscious. It does for a reason as it temporarily gets rid of the problem. But, deep rooted feelings in subconscious keep raring ugly head from time to time. It is like something bad in our system that our system is trying flush out but it has to go thru conscious and as soon as it reaches conscious, conscious dwells on it, feels agitated and in order to feel temporarily good, it pushes it back to the subconscious and the cycle continues.

This may be one of the explanation for why bad experiences from childhood impact for a long time when much worse experiences later in life do not even bother us. Say, something really bad that happened when you
were 4-5 years old, may bother you even today. But, something even far worse happened when you were, say ,25-26, you hardly remember. Even when you remember you tend to dwell more on that much older experience than the one in the recent past.

During childhood, our ability to bear harsh experiences is very limited. So, conscious pushes harsh experiences into subconscious in no time. As we grow older and experience new things, our ability to squarely face things increases. With this, less our conscious pushes things into subconscious and more it deals with it then and there. The damn experiences that are there in the subconscious haunt us for long time. Many of us remember chastising and scolding and humiliations we got from elders especially the ones that we really did not deserve or was far too much for a small mistake or was delivered in front of many people which was way too much for us. This is what becomes childhood trauma if it gets out of hand. People with untreated childhood trauma grow up to have all sorts of mental problems. Spilt personality is an extreme case of that. Split personality is not a fancy behavior picked up to look different or escape from legal system It indeed is a mental transformation and a genuine problem.. Watch the movie "Never talk to strangers" starring Rebecca DeMornay and Antonio Banderas. It is one of the finest movies depicting some effects of split personality.

If the thing that we trying to forget goes only deeper into subconscious, how do we avoid it? Thoughts operate in a common framework. Only way to replace a thought is to think another thought. Power of substitution. Substitute a thought with something else. Use techniques such as repeating a holy name, getting into something physically engaging etc. That's the only way to stop the mind from idling. Shut the devil's workshop for good.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 6:54 PM EDT
Updated: Friday, 23 June 2006 7:14 PM EDT
Thursday, 22 June 2006
Useless
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean
it's useless."

Thomas A. Edison (1847 - 1931)

History is full of inventions which ended up being used for entirely
different purposes than originally intended.

Let's start with a bit of humor. Viagra, the virility increasing pill for
men, was developed because the drug composition showed promises to address some
heart ailments. During the development, things changed. It started become
clear that this drug was not going to be very useful to treat heart ailments. Some
innovative souls experimented and found that it could treat some other
'organ' very effectively. They changed the direction of their research.
After a few year, viola, one of the most successful drugs in medical
history to address some real problem of certain people.

Other example is "Post It" notes that have become so ubiquitous. The adhesive
that is used at the back of "Post it" notes was considered as a failure as it
did not meet the required criteria when developed. It did not have enough
strength. But, lack of adhesiveness was exactly what makes "Post it" so useful.
3M company created a long lasting cash cow.

After having realized these kind of things, some companies such as 3M,
Rubbermaid, Google and many others encourage people to try out a lot of
things even if they do not seem to be in line with company's strategy. It is
also not uncommon among drug companies to have a plan B for intended use
right from the beginning. It only makes sense as the money goes into new
drug development is in billions of dollars.

Always look for utility value. Recycling everything possible should be the
motto.

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Posted by Mahesh at 6:49 PM EDT
Updated: Thursday, 22 June 2006 6:55 PM EDT
Humor
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood"

Mary Hirsch

When used effectively, humor is indeed a very good tool to make your point.

Although it may act like a sword that does not draw blood, do not ignore the
fact that it may cause more hurt to emotions and sentiments which can last
longer and more painful than a sword wound. External wounds heal faster.
For internal wounds, time is the only remedy. They only heal with time.

Best form of humor is to make yourself the center of humor. Nobody is going to
feel hurt if you do that. Some of your near and dear ones may get upset with
you for making fun of yourselves. Other than that, it is pretty harmless. If
you have some idiosyncrasy or a drawback or a handicap, is it not a good idea
to bare it open rather than someone speculate and make fun of you in your
back? We have to make sure that we do not take it to extreme and keep
deprecating ourselves on even things that people won't even notice.

One of the best things I had read somewhere was - once a person going to the
interview got soaking wet when rains started unexpectedly. It was not
possible to go back to get alternate set of clothes. It was a very
important interview too. He showed up and said, "nature probably thought I
needed another shower before the interview. I really did not but did not
have a choice.". That's the spirit.

"It is better to make fun of ourselves and rather than let others do it." In certain
societies, humor can be very personally attacking. Making fun of ourselves
when we find ourselves in the midst of a group in which we know there is
at least one person who can use humor to attack us personally, we may want to
crack one or two jokes about ourselves thus taking away any ammunition from
that person. After that, chances are, other people will shut that person up
when he tries take jab at you.

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Posted by Mahesh at 6:34 PM EDT
Updated: Thursday, 22 June 2006 6:44 PM EDT
Manager v/s Leader
Topic: Quotable Quotes
What is the difference between a manager and a leader?

There are several ways to look at this and come up with several distinction.

Some interesting distinctions are worth taking a look.
"Leader do right things. Managers do things right."
"Leaders are effective. Managers are efficient."
"Leaders are strategic. Managers are tactical."
"Managerial success means being able to climb to top of the ladder as quickly, as safely and as efficienlyt as possible. Leadership success means making sure that the ladder is leaning against the right wall."
Are managers and leaders mutually exclusive? IMO, all leaders have to be at least somewhat good managers if they want to be successful leaders. Managers having leadership qualities do well. But, we all have seen many efficient and successful managers who had absolutely no leadership qualities. You would not follow them at all let alone following with full faith.

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Posted by Mahesh at 6:25 PM EDT
Wednesday, 21 June 2006
Worry
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"What's the use of worrying? It never was worthwhile." - by George Asaf, O Magazine, October 2002

One of the best quotes to illustrates the worthlessness of worrying goes like this -"worrying about a problem is like trying to solve an algebraic equation by chewing on the pencil."

Another great quote which highlights how expensive worrying goes like this -"worry is like paying interest on a loan that you never took."

Does worrying solve any problem? Not mere worrying. Little bit of initial worrying about the enormity of a new challenge is normal. But, worrying about uncertainties and all probable consequences is not useful at all. Hurry, worry and curry is a deadly combination. Fire burns a dead body. Worry burns a living body.

One of the best ways to deal with worry is to set up a worry register and worry time. Worry register can be a simple notebook that you can carry with you all the time. Size does not matter.

Whenever a worry strikes you, do this. First do not dwell much on it. All that you should spend is to develop as clear understanding as possible about the worry. Impose say 5 minutes limitation on the act of developing the definition of the worry. Once you do that capture your worry in 2-3 sentences. If you like, put date, time and write briefly the state of your mind. Then try as hard as possible not worry. If you can not stop worrying, start documenting worries about the worry not worried. You should stop writing only when you realize that writing about worries is no fun or less painful than to worry..

Then, set up a fixed 'worry time'. 1 hour per week is optimal. But, in the beginning it is just not possible to stay away from worrying that long. If it helps, set up 15 minutes per day to begin with. During the appoint 'worry time', you go thru your notebook and review every worry that has not been dealt with.

Take one worry at a time and see if it is still applicable. It is impossible that you would laugh at yourself for having worried about something that is no longer a worry at all. With practice a lot of worries vanish this way. Cross each such proudly with a red marker to symbolize the ceremonial slaying of the worry. This ritual helps and fun. This not necessary but if it helps, go for it.

To get best results, your "worry time" should be as spaced out as possible. This is because in a week's time a lot of things change. A lot of new facts emerge which change the definition of the worry. This will help you to address the problem. You will be able to crystallize a better definition of the worry. Don't they say "problem well stated is problem half solved"? This also applies to worries. When you can really put you finger on what exactly worries you and are able to phrase it, solutions naturally emerge. It takes good amount of work by your subconscious mind to mull over the worry to hint a solution. Let the subconscious do it for you and you stay away from worries.

Always carry the worry book, promptly record worries, limit worrying to worry time, promptly slay worries, plan responses for worries which have become clearer. This is a good framework to manage worries.

Of course, we all have to mature to realize that there are something about which worrying or doing anything does not help. "If there is a solution, find it. If three is not one, then do not mind it." "Grant me the will and courage to change things that I can. Grant me patience and fortitude to put up with things that I can not change. Grant me the wisdom to know the difference between the two and act accordingly." (May not be exact wordings but close enough)

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Posted by Mahesh at 7:54 PM EDT
Updated: Sunday, 9 July 2006 10:46 AM EDT
Right response
Topic: Quotable Quotes

What can we learn from water in a pond?

We notice but do not think much about how the water responds when we drop anything into it.

If we can term the response, it is certainly a 'measured response'.

The amount of disturbance in the form of ripples is very appropriate to deal with the action (such as dropping a stone). If we drop a bigger object, more and wide spread ripples lasting longer and if we drop a pebble, small ripples that disappear quickly.

Can we take something from this to better our lives? We certainly can. We should examine ourselves if we respond with a 'measured response' appropriate for the action. More often than not we 'over react'. We do not even respond. We just react. In the hope of neutralizing the threat (many times our perception), we react with more than required power.

Take for example - someone disagrees with us. This is an action. 'Measured response' in this case consists of first to acknowledge their action and second is to weigh what it means to us. Rest should follow based these two points. Many times, our reaction to disagreements is to become very volatile or completely withdrawn depending upon our nature and circumstances. Both of these are certain extreme overreactions and do not help to deal with the situation.

There is also a huge difference between a response and a reaction. Response is normally an act which has been thought out with pros and cons reasonably well understood. Reaction is more often what we call a knee jerk reaction and is more instinctive than anything else. Of course we can not plan a response for every conceivable event. That will lead to "paralysis by over analysis". However, we can certainly develop a framework which enables us to develop and deliver a response. We can adjust the framework to suit the conditions. If there is not much time to develop a detailed response, framework will allow us to provide at least a poor but timely response (may well be close to reaction) with full understanding of the circumstances under which we responded that way.

We do not recognize harmful effects of over reaction because its effect are slow but lasting. Many effects are not good for us. Frequent overreaction leads to ultimate nervous breakdown. Some sort of allergies are attributed to tendency to overreact. High blood pressure has become very common in people who react in a volatile manner to every small thing which goes against their grain. People who become withdrawn also overreact in a different manner. Such people have been found to develop all sort of gastrointestinal disorders because of the effect of repressed emotions on the system.

So, if repressing emotions has harmful effects, should we go ahead and express emotions and feel relieved? Most of the negative emotions such as impatience, anger, hatred, fear, greed etc. have negative impact when repressed. They have even worse impact when expressed as being very expressive with such emotions is the surest way to alienate the world around you. So, what do we do?

Answer is harnessing the emotions. Emotions are energy. How do put it to use is up to us. Transform negative emotions to positive ones even if we have to fake it till you make it. Famous prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi is a great one to repeat so that we can always remember that it is possible to transform negative emotions to positive ones. We can pray to Lord using this prayer to empower is to effect such a transformation. This Sri Easwaran's favorite prayer or one of the favorites.

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury,pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.


O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen

http://www.catholic-forum.com/saintS/pray0027.htm

So, always respond instead of reacting. By responding you are in control. We can not control what is hurled at us but we can control our responses. Always plan to provide a measured response. Conserve the energy wasted from over reaction. Transform negative emotions to positive emotions to have best of both worlds.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 7:26 PM EDT
Updated: Wednesday, 21 June 2006 7:52 PM EDT
Tuesday, 20 June 2006
Gaza Strip
Topic: Movies

From www.netflix.com:

The embattled Gaza Strip is the setting for this stirring documentary from American filmmaker James Longley. Initially intending his film to be a straightforward look at the Palestinian intifada, Longley headed there in January 2001 for what he thought would be two short weeks. Instead, he stayed for three months, logging over 75 hours of film that tracked a number of momentous occasions, including the election of Prime Minister Ariel Sharon.

Nice documentary movie capturing the details about 'Intifada' movement that was a grassroots movement started by Palestinians living in occupied territories after they became disenchanted with their leaders living away in Tunis and ignoring their plight. Their action plan was to pelt rocks and stones at every possible moment at Israelis. It was difficult for Israelis to use heavy force on people using such crude and comparatively less harmful arms. Moreover, children were so actively involved that any violence on children worked against Israel.

A newspaper boy is the central character in the documentary. His day-to-day life has been captured very well.

3 stars.

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Posted by Mahesh at 10:05 PM EDT
Showing up!
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"80% of success is just showing up to play the game."

Although remaining 20% determines who wins or where we may be placed among everyone who have shown up, first 80%. where 80% of the competition vanishes.

But, importance of hauling ourselves to show up to play, in the first place, can not be downplayed.

How often we see people with far less capabilities having all the success? We only feel envious at such people. This feeling of envy is directly proportional to how unprepared we were not to show up when these lesser mortals (as we thought, incorrectly, of them) went to on play and won.

80% importance is placed on showing up for a reason. It is much harder to motivate ourselves to get started than to maintain the momentum once started. We all know about inertia. The term inertia which once was limited to physics has now come to all areas. Organizational inertia, individual inertia etc. Object in motion continues to be in motion unless there is something to stop it. In ideal world, it continues perpetually.

Remaining 20% decides our success and to what extent we succeed. But, as we can recall from many of our experiences, we normally do an outstanding job of leaving no stone unturned in this 20% once we get started. We are motivated to do our best as soon as we pass 50% mark of 80%. Sheer momentum keeps us going.

Not motivating ourselves to show up has serious consequences. How often we have commented about someone else that they are not making best use of their potential. We have to be careful with passing such judgments because some people may not aspire for things that we think they should. But,when we find people who are plain lazy, complacent, full of negative energy, we are saddened to see such a great potential going down the drain.

It is not easy to motivate ourselves to show up to play. This is especially hard after we have experienced some setbacks and disappointments. Those people are truly blessed who are able to pick themselves up over and over again as though nothing has happened. For normal people, some downtime is expected and it reasonable that we take some to recharge. But, spending rest of our life not trying anything just because we may fail is sheer wastage of God given potential.

"Past only bothers to the extent we have NOT learnt from it." "People who do not learn from the past are dammed to repeat it." Let's learn from our past experiences, do a thorough and honest post-mortem and move on.

As said before, it certainly is not easy to recover from a setback especially if it is a big one and has caused significant grief (financial or other). We have to walk when we can not run and we have to crawl when we can not even walk. One step at a time. Even if we have to take a break after every step, as long as we remember to take the next step, it's only a matter of time that we are cruising at our full capacity.

Taking next step in our endeavors amounts to doing the next logical task. When our mind is clouded by a recent defeat, determining what is the next step itself can be a big problem. Easiest thing to overcome such lethargy is to develop a habit of constantly asking 'what is next?'. David Allen's "Getting things done" is great book not only to improve productivity but also to get out of inertia. It's a great book and certainly recommend for reading over and over again.

Good luck in motivating to show up. Remember by just showing up you have eliminated the good chunk competition (i.e. all those who did not choose to show up). Now it is time to play our best game and leave the rest to God. If it is good, we will get it. If we don't get it, it was not meant to be.

Cheers!
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Posted by Mahesh at 8:14 PM EDT
Monday, 19 June 2006
BLUF in Communications?

What is the last thing we want to do if we want to have effective communication? We certainly do not want to bluff. But, there is a different kind of BLUF that is very useful for effective communication especially in written communication.

BLUF stands for Bottom Line Up Front. This is same as the phrases people use cut the crap, cut to chase, coming to point etc.

In BLUF, you mention the most important thing first and then provide clarification. If the bottom line has shock potential then you can prepare a bit but still must get to the bottom line quickly. Once you communicate the bottom line and then time to provide explanation, explanation sinks better than it would if you spend a lot of time in the beginning to explain and then provide the bottom line at the very end.

Picked it from one podcast from www.manager-tools.com. This a great source to gain a lot of management insight. Two people who host these podcasts have accumulated a lot of knowledge from experience and from several sources. It is like getting nice summary extracts from all good management books. Check that out.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 7:12 PM EDT
Sunday, 18 June 2006
Darna Zaroori Hai
Topic: Movies

Darna Zaroori Hai - Hindi movie from Ram Gopal Varma camp. RGV and his disciples make a sequel to 'Darna Mana Hai'.

Decent movie. 6 stories. Spooky ones. Some nice ones and some not so good. The ones involving Rajpal Yadav and Randip Hooda are really gripping . Others so so.

Photography and editing which have become the highlight of RGV productions are good in this too. They know how to capture in right angles. In one of the last scenes when the last kid is desperately trying to get out of the spooky house, camera alternates between frightened kid and a haunting balcony at the top floor with a single light. That is simply mastery.

Time pass. 3 stars.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 8:16 PM EDT
36 China Town
Topic: Movies

36 China Town - Hindi movie with big star cast - Shahid Kapur, Kareena Kapoor, Payal Rohatgi, Paresh Rawal, Akshay Khanna, Upen Patel (debuting).

Abbas-Mastan, directors, disappoint. They try to create a mystery where there is none. They nail some totally impossible people as perpetrators of some crime which nobody can understand how it happened.

So, what is left in this? Nothing much. Upen Patel, of course. Looks like he is building a nice golden bridge from modeling to movies. Smart thing to do as dudes do not last long in modeling. In movies, they last little longer.

Music - first song is good. Otherwise, do not know what Himesh Reshimiya these days itna-bhav-kha-raha-hai.

Waste.

2 stars!

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Posted by Mahesh at 3:13 PM EDT
Lemonade from Lemon

"If life deliverers a lemon, make lemonade out of it."

Following two stories illustrate best lemonade made from some of the bitterest lemons life delivered to some people.

Both of these are found in Dale Carnegie's timeless classic "Stop worrying and start living".

In Arabic there is a term that is often used. That is - "Maktoob" meaning "(It is) written". If an Arab loses a big bet in a casino, this is what he exclaims raising both hands to sky. It is used to mean - "it is all God's will". People tend to mistake this for fatalistic mentality. But, people who use it, use it differently and most effectively.

What is the first thing necessary to recover from a setback? Recognizing that some screw up has happened is indeed the first thing towards recovery. Without that realization, we are in denial about the mishap. This realization is not all easy to come because what has happened defies all rational thinking (or what we call rational thinking at that moment even if it is utterly irrational). So, saying 'Maktoob' or "it was all God's will" helps us to transfer all the responsibility to God and take some solace that since it was God's will, it must be for eventual good.

Once we calm down after saying 'Maktoob', we can set out to take some remedial measures. Dale Carnegie quotes an incident related to nomadic Arabs wandering god forsaken desert in northern Africa with their one and only asset - sheep. Once the caravan was caught in a severe sand storm. Most of the sheep were dead when the sand storm subsided. Arabs were sad for a moment that they had lost good 80% of their assets. The leader exclaimed famous 'Maktoob' and the rest knew what to do. They systematically slaughtered the sheep which had not yet deteriorated. They smoked and processed the meat so that they can use it in the future. After that they moved on with their nomadic journey. This is one case making lemonade if life deliverers you a lemon.

Second incident, again from Carnegie's "Stop worrying and star living", involves a man in Florida.

Do you know there is a place called Rattlesnake in Florida. Follow this link to see for yourself - http://www.pburch.net/Genealogy/burch-fisher-Pages/Image19.html

There is a amazing story behind how this place came to be called as Rattlesnake. Long ago, a man bought some land around this area. He had some plans for this land. But, it was infested with rattle snakes and only rattle snakes. This man was perplexed. He had purchased the land with some idea in mind. He had not noticed rattle snake menace and now he was in this predicament. Land was useless. He hit upon an idea. Why not make lemonade from the lemon? There were abundant rattle snakes. Put them to good use. He developed a complete industry around rattle snakes. He farmed them to extract venom for vaccines. He started a meat processing plant to package rattle snake meat (yikes) and what not. Over time, he became famous, rich and an example for all those who got lemons and made lemonades out of it. This man did not get any ordinary lemon. He got bitterest lemon and made lemonade out of it.

So, always remember to say 'Maktoob' and set out to squeeze that damn lemon. Lemonade shall be made. That's God's will.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 9:13 AM EDT
Updated: Sunday, 18 June 2006 2:40 PM EDT
Gangster
Topic: Movies

Gangster - Hindi movie starring Shiney Ahuja, Kangna Ranaut, Irfan Hashmi etc.

What a nice story line? But, they have botched it up thoroughly. Entire cast is immature to make a great movie on such a great story line. Characters played by Shiney and Kangna are loaded. They need someone who can really act. But, these two people simply can not do justice to their respective roles.

Director Basu disappoints. Poor cinematography. No idea what's up with Bhatt camp films. But for some strange reason they process their films to look really poor. So little light. Everything seems to take place under neon lights and in dark back ground. "Kalyug" was like that too. Only if there were to shoot and process in more brightness, it would have been lot more bearable.

Supposedly based on the story of gangster Abu Salem and his girl friend actresses Monica Bedi. Even if there is any, there is very little connection.

2 stars

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Posted by Mahesh at 9:00 AM EDT
Updated: Sunday, 18 June 2006 9:10 AM EDT
Ability
Topic: Quotable Quotes
Ability will never catch up with the demand for it.
-- Malcolm Forbes (1919 - 1990)

There is a saying which goes something like "better you get, you better get better". As we get better at something, we are awarded a new challenge. If not for this we never evolve out of our comfort zone. It is also true that with right preparation we are presented with right challenge which is indeed a stretch but we can accomplish it if we put little more.

Lord is a master goal setter. Lord knows more about stretch goals than we can afford to set ourselves. So, instead of wasting time setting goals and sizing ourselves up if we are adequate or not, we should take challenges head on and chances are we succeed if the end and the means used to achieve it are just and right in the eyes of Lord.

Sri Easwaran's writes in of his books -"we all have right amount of burden to carry. Not one pound less than we are capable of carrying or not one pound more." To begin with, our ability to carry this load is miniscule. But, with some years of life, we come to realization that we have a large load of Karma to carry and get rid of. We preferably want to accomplish this as much as possible in this very life. That way we can complete as close as possible to the final goal or God willing even achieve it.

What is the way to manage more load than we are capable of carrying? Magic word is leverage. We use it without much thought in every other aspect of our lives. But, when it comes to carrying our load of Karma, we forget that we can leverage that too. Our most efficient lever is the grace of Lord. Use him for your support to carry Karma load and you can immediately gain tremendous leverage. That's why it is said -"belief in God is the surest sign of wisdom."

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 8:35 AM EDT
Success
Topic: Quotable Quotes

Men are born to succeed, not fail.

-- Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862)

Nice quote about success from Thoreau. Many other quotes can be found at -http://www.quotationspage.com

"Men are born to success, not fail." - this quote reinforces that regardless of what we are today and what we many have encountered in the past, we are bound to be successful.

It is a different matter if the state that God finds as success does not match our definition of success. When it does not match, we curse our luck. We have a very limited view of the life as we see it and not necessarily as the life really is. So, we think this or that is good for us and that indeed is success. When do not get what we want, we forget to take minute to see what we may have gained in the pursuit. Invariably, there is something to gain for every experience. Even when we do not get, say a coveted job or a position, something is being said about the whole thing. We may brood for a day or two or sometimes even entire lifetime for not being successful at that particular endeavor.

However, God chose that it was not the best for us at that moment of time. This insight is very hard to come before we have had some experience in life. Not at all easy before 30's as it takes around 30 years to see one cycle which can be thought to be something like a mini life cycle. If we live for another 60 years or so, we can expect basically same cycle to repeat in a different form. But, we can reflect and mend our ways so that remaining one or two cycles end up being different and better. This fundamental notion that we are all born to succeed to should help us reinvigorate ourselves and pick ourselves up from minor deviations and move on.

Sometimes, we all lose our ways and take a wrong detour. Sooner we come back to the main road, more gas we will have left to complete rest of our journey. It does not matter even if we develop this insight very late in life.No need to regret that we have only 10 or 15 years left at the most. We are all assured by the Lord that he would preserve our good deeds in this life and help us start exactly at the point where we left off. It is like Lord taking us and positioning us at a particular point on the running tracks so that we are given credit for the distance we have already run. So, without despair, we can set out to do what we want to. If what we want to do is just and right and is good for us in the eyes of God, we will be blessed with that. If not, take heart and understand that it was not meant to be.

In Bollywood, they have a saying in hindi -"waqt se pehele aur naseeb se jyada kisi ko kuch mila hai aur milega bhi nahin.". This means - "no one has got anything before the time is right and no one has got anything more than they deserve." This should not be viewed as a fatalistic mentality. It is a realization that follows after some years of getting some things and getting sheer disappointments in pursuit of things that were not meant for us. But, good thing is that, when this insight comes, it comes along with a lot of discretion as well. We also develop insight to pursue things that are good for us relentlessly rather than giving them up at the first or second minor obstacle.

Cheers!

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Posted by Mahesh at 8:06 AM EDT
Saturday, 17 June 2006
Incredible experiences - Bhagvadgita

Two incredible experiences. Seem to come straight from Ripley's believe it or not. (http://www.ripleys.com/)

1) This is from someone I know very well and full trust. So, no reason even to suspect anything here (at least for me).

This person developed unusual fascination for crocodiles ever since he saw one very first time when he was 10 years old or so. First sighting was not unexpected or scary as they were boating in some place which was known to have crocodiles. He says after that he was always yearning to see crocodiles at every opportunity. But, he never got to see crocodiles, at least, in natural surroundings. He remembers having seen them a couple of times in zoos. But, that did not interest him much.

This fascination with crocodiles turned into something very different after a few years. He started to have dreams in which crocodiles appeared in or the other way. He had dreams of crocodiles at least once a week. Sometimes, almost daily. But, one thing he remembers very well is that despite having read many crocodile attacks on humans and other scary stories, crocodiles never did anything to harm him in his dreams. So, none of those dreams were nightmares or unduly concerning. Crocodiles used to appear either lazing in the water or basking in the sun or in some weird dense formation in a very small pond or something on those lines.

Dreams continued for some year. His interest about crocodiles also kept growing. He spent time searching for crocodiles stories on the interment, books and from people who had anything to share. He became a walking encyclopedia on crocodiles and many interesting incidents from all over the world. He had to since there was probably no publicly available information which he had not read. He was so intrigued by few clipping of crocodiles attacks posted on national geographic web site that he watched them over and over in awe. Once in a while he used to get concerned about this strange obsession. However, since it did not affect him negatively anyway other than taking most of his spare time, he did not care much.

Once he picked up Bhagvadgita, one of the holiest scriptures of India, and got interested in it. He read one or two pages everyday. He says although he enjoyed Gita, there was nothing remarkable that happened while he continued to read Gita till he landed on that part of Gita where in a few verses Lord Krishna describes his different forms. He does not remember that very well. But, there was something that hit his consciousness and transformed. Lord Krishna while explaining his different forms says among aquatic creatures he is crocodile. This person says he had never experienced anything more strange and spooky than the moment this revelation of Lord Krishna as crocodile registered in his mind. For a couple of minutes it was like a non-stop blinding lightning and deafening thunder and he kind of passing out. Not painful but not comfortable either. The effect lasted a few minutes. More funny thing happened afterwards. He says it's been more than a year or so and he has not had even a single crocodile dream. This story is simply mind blowing. After this experience, this person's life changed for better. He developed a better perspective on life. His obsession with crocodiles stopped and in his own words 'he sees a flicker at the end of the tunnel'

That particular verse is 31st verse from chapter 10 of Gita.

Pavanah pavataamasmi raamah shastrabhritaamaham;
Jhashaanaam makarashchaasmi srotasaamasmi jaahnavee.

31. Among the purifiers (or the speeders) I am the wind; Rama among the warriors am I; among the fishes I am the shark; among the streams I am the Ganga.

(Note: In the Bhagvadgita posted below from http://oaks.nvg.org/ys6ra8.html, 'makara' is translated as shark which IMO is incorrect. Anyway, in the book that this person was reading, it was mentioned as crocodiles and that's how it is in most of the other books too.)

2) It would have been difficult to believe in the above mentioned miracle story if it were not for another similar incident documented by V.M. Joshi who is said to have been part of Late Subashchandra Bose's INA (Indian National Army) and fought in certain battles. This story is referenced in spiritual discourses of Sri Bannanje Gocindacharya, an eminent authority on spirituality. Sri Bannanje's spiritual discourse in Kannada are one of the best. They can be found at - http://www.kannadaaudio.com/Songs/Devotional/home/. Search for 'Bannanje' and I think this specific reference is in his discourse on Gita or 'yoga jivana'. If you understand Kannada, all his discourses there are worth listening and in the process you will also see him referring to V.M.Johsi's experience.

V.M.Joshi writes in his book about an air crash that he happened to see. This plane had crashed and everyone had perished. People who were scouting the accident site suddenly heard a baby crying. They were very surprised to see that a baby survived when everyone else had perished. Due to some divine intervention, the baby had landed on thick grass and that had saved it from the impact. But, the shocking discovery was the fact that there was a book which was resting on baby's chest. Regular sized book. First amazing discovery was that the book was Bhagvadgita. When they took the book from baby's chest and glanced at the page, first thing that they saw was one of the most famous verses in Gita in which Lord Krishna assures his devotees 'yoga kshemam vahamyam' meaning "I will take care of your well being." Bannanje wondered how incredible is this story for this to happen. Who knows what good deeds the baby had done in its past births and what Lord wanted to convey. But it is very hard to brush either of these stories as myths or imaginations.

The verse is from chapter 9 is given below.

Ananyaashchintayanto maam you janaah paryupaasate;
Teshaam nityaabhiyuktaanaam yogakshemam vahaamyaham.

22. To those men who worship me alone, thinking of no other, of those ever united, I secure what is not already possessed and preserve what they already possess.

Now, ask yourselves if these two incidents are anything you can see at Ripley's. Listening and pondering over these two stories has been like a life changing experience for many of us. Imagine the experience of those blessed ones who experienced it first hand.

God Bless!

Following are the verses from Chapter 9 where Lord Krishna reveals his different forms.

28. Among weapons I am the thunderbolt; among cows I am the wish-fulfilling cow called Surabhi; I am the progenitor, the god of love; among serpents I am Vasuki.

Anantashchaasmi naagaanaam varuno yaadasaamaham;
Pitreenaamaryamaa chaasmi yamah samyamataamaham.

29. I am Ananta among the Nagas; I am Varuna among water-Deities; Aryaman among the manes I am; I am Yama among the governors.

Prahlaadashchaasmi daityaanaam kaalah kalayataamaham;
Mrigaanaam cha mrigendro'ham vainateyashcha pakshinaam.

30. And, I am Prahlad among the demons; among the reckoners I am time; among beasts I am their king, the lion; and Garuda among birds.

Pavanah pavataamasmi raamah shastrabhritaamaham;
Jhashaanaam makarashchaasmi srotasaamasmi jaahnavee.

31. Among the purifiers (or the speeders) I am the wind; Rama among the warriors am I; among the fishes I am the shark; among the streams I am the Ganga.

Sargaanaamaadirantashcha madhyam chaivaaham arjuna;
Adhyaatmavidyaa vidyaanaam vaadah pravadataamaham.

32. Among creations I am the beginning, the middle and also the end, Arjuna! Among the sciences I am the science of the Self; and I am logic among controversialists.

Aksharaanaamakaaro'smi dwandwah saamaasikasya cha;
Ahamevaakshayah kaalo dhaataaham vishwatomukhah.

33. Among the letters of the alphabet, the letter "A" I am, and the dual among the compounds. I am verily the inexhaustible or everlasting time; I am the dispenser (of the fruits of actions), having faces in all directions.

Mrityuh sarvaharashchaaham udbhavashcha bhavishyataam;
Keertih shreervaakcha naareenaam smritirmedhaadhritih kshamaa.

34. And I am all-devouring death, and prosperity of those who are to be prosperous; among feminine qualities (I am) fame, prosperity, speech, memory, intelligence, firmness and forgiveness.

Brihatsaama tathaa saamnaam gaayatree cchandasaamaham;
Maasaanaam maargasheersho'hamritoonaam kusumaakarah.

35. Among the hymns also I am the Brihatsaman; among metres Gayatri am I; among the months I am Margasirsa; among seasons (I am) the flowery season.

Dyootam cchalayataamasmi tejastejaswinaamaham;
Jayo'smi vyavasaayo'smi sattwam sattwavataamaham.

36. I am the gambling of the fraudulent; I am the splendour of the splendid; I am victory; I am determination (of those who are determined); I am the goodness of the good.

Vrishneenaam vaasudevo'smi paandavaanaam dhananjayah;
Muneenaamapyaham vyaasah kaveenaamushanaa kavih.

37. Among Vrishnis I am Vasudeva; among the Pandavas I am Arjuna; among sages I am Vyasa; among poets I am Usana, the poet.

Dando damayataamasmi neetirasmi jigeeshataam;
Maunam chaivaasmi guhyaanaam jnaanam jnaanavataamaham.

38. Among the punishers I am the sceptre; among those who seek victory I am statesmanship; and also among secrets I am silence; knowledge among knowers I am.

Yachchaapi sarvabhootaanaam beejam tadahamarjuna;
Na tadasti vinaa yatsyaanmayaa bhootam charaacharam.

39. And whatever is the seed of all beings, that also am I, Arjuna! There is no being, whether moving or unmoving, that can exist without me.

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Posted by Mahesh at 3:41 PM EDT
Updated: Saturday, 17 June 2006 4:26 PM EDT
Ask v/s speculate
Topic: Quotable Quotes
"Don't speculate when you can ask."

Makes sense? Agony of being in suspense over something is far more painful than any risk involved in looking straight into other person's eyes and asking directly. How often we do this? Not many times especially when we must.

Speculation is best left to things that are really unpredictable. But, otherwise, there are many things where are we are better of asking than to speculate.

Why don't we ask our customers how we are doing? We can keep it specific or general. Isn't this question better than speculating what customer may be thinking? It is possible that when we ask this question, the other party may give a less than honest and less than completely true answer. That's their problem. We have got atleast something to work on. We have plugged some holes to protect ourselves from being asked in the future, "you never asked us if we were satisfied."

Once we get the answer to initial question, we can analyze answer to see if it is true or false. If we want to probe further, we already have successful precedence of having asked the question. Second time should only be easier. We can also document and share it with the other party. Best way to put such thing in writing is to start off with something such "thanks for taking time to answer few of our questions. This memo describes our understanding of your answers. Please review and let us know if there are any corrections or clarifications.". Notice the tone here. We are saying that we may be wrong. That's okay. We are giving the other party an opportunity here to correct themselves and also us. It is not all unusual that once you present your understanding, story normally only grows.Seeing in writing makes the other party really think, if they said all this. What are the implications? Many times, it only becomes easier and clearer once you start this questioning process.

What if people simply do not answer your question? That is not the best situation but there are some measures you can take to reduce the anxiety coming from uncertainty. You can gently coax the person to answer your questions. If nothing works, just explain to them the importance of getting answers to your burning questions and that in lieu of their answer tell them what you think is the answer and make sure that the other party clearly understands that you would proceed on the basis that unless they correct, you would take your answer as their answer. This is better than being totally in dark and waste your time and energy in speculation. This is like making a path when one does not exist. You do not know if it is the right path but at least you have none to say that it is not the right path.

We have probably been penalized more often for not asking timely questions than asking questions. We have to make sure that questionsare pertinent to our objective at hand. If we are not discretionary in asking questions, we only come across as nosey and an insensitive AH. So, stay away from questions that are not safe, potentially offending, private, upsetting etc. On other legitimate topics, take out your AK-47, pop in a magazine with enough rounds to kill all your doubts, and fire on - questions, I mean.

Cheers!
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Posted by Mahesh at 10:33 AM EDT
Friday, 16 June 2006
Communication
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"Write to express. Not to impress."

"Listen to understand. Not to respond."

How do you write to express? Write like Mark Twain. Simple style and concise prose. Twain said "writings of famous writers is like wine. mine is like water. everyone drinks water." Twain also had advised some youngster to keep his simple style when he had come to ask for Mark Twain's suggestions as how to improve his style.

Regardless of style, there are many other things that we can practice to improve the effectiveness of our writing. With information overload that we all experience, it is very easy for recipients to miss our message. We all get so many e-mails everyday and we know which e-mails are easy to read and act on. We love people who write such e-mails. What are some of the secrets of effective business writing? Let's limit to business wiring.

1) Write in small sentences

2) Use a lot of white space

3) Use double spacing all the time.

4) Indent appropriately especially when natural hierarchy exists (such as problem and possible causes, symptom and reasons)

5) Get to the crux ASAP

6) Greetings, apologies, BS, suck up etc. are needed. But, keep them at the end. Let people end with a happy note.

7) Use SEER format. SEER format is normally used for writing reviews. It is equally useful for other memos too. It involves dividing your writing into four distinct parts - 1)Statement 2) Explanation 3)Example to provide better explanation 4) Review (or summary at the end)

8) Use bold, underline, italics etc. very sparely. If you leave a lot of white space and indent properly and use right fonts for headings and sub headings, bold and underlines are not much needed.

10) Where possible, get the verb as early as possible. Always write in active voice. This ensures that verb appears ASAP.

11) Use bullets, numbers liberally. How often we have gone into a meeting with some document and there is a long list everyone is struggling to come to a common understanding (third bullet from the top. No, No, I meant third from the bottom. Numbering avoids this.)

13) Use tables, graphs, pictures liberally. On graphs, please do explain axis clearly.

14) Limit business memos to 2 pages at the most.

15) Do not let a section run into more than 2 pages at the most. If a section runs into 2 double spaced pages, you can easily break that into several sections.

16) Keep the reader in mind

17) Some people learn by reading and some people learn by listening / speaking. Do not send memos to people who learn by listening/speaking. With such people, spend time and then summarize in a brief memo. Everyone is happy.

To be an effective communicator, we need to listen well. Listen with a quiet and attentive mind. It is said that for every minute we speak, we better listen for five. Listening is not hearing. It's okay to take time to respond. This will free you to listen when you are supposed to be listening. We fear that we have to respond as soon as we hear anything remotely objectionable. Keep in mind that acknowledgement is not agreement. In fact, every one should expect that they are acknowledged and not automatically agreed. If the other party takes your acknowledgment for agreement, it is their problem.

It is not only important to listen but also let the speaker know that you are listening. Make eye contact as much as possible. Use effective body language as nodding, smile etc. Avoid body language which upsets or intimidates the speaker. Speaker may hide much from you if you come across as hostile. 'Poker face' is good if it can help to make the speaker comfortable.

Lincoln said - "if you are silent people may think you are idiot. by speaking you will remove any doubts." Not that we do not have anything meaningful to say but in general people speak more than listen.

One of the best quotes on silence and listening is -"I can speak of only what I know. If I remain silent and let others speak, I know what they know."

Pass your words thru 3 gates. First gate, is it true? if not send it back. Second gate, is it kind? if not send it back. If it passes these two gates, then next gate is to ask if it is necessary? if not, you do not have to send back always. Sometimes to keep social interactions going we can speak words if they are true and kind.

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Posted by Mahesh at 6:49 PM EDT
Boredom
Topic: Quotable Quotes

"[S]he refused to be bored chiefly because she wasn't boring." by Zelda Fitzgerald

Are we responsible for whether we feel bored or not?

Another saying is - you don't like to do things not because they are boring. Things become boring because you don't like them.

If we give some thought to this, it does seem to start making sense. How often something we found dreadfully
boring to begin with turn out to be something that we cherish and feel proud to have produced it? Normally, we can think of some document we had to write or a paper we had to turn in for school. Next time when it happens, if we document how that happened, we will see that there is a pattern or a couple of patterns.

One pattern that is not that useful is being under pressure. That is the pressure of time or some other external source (such as customer, boss etc.). This does not produce classics although it may have forced you to complete the tasks.

But, think of the other pattern. That normally goes like this. With great difficulty, you garner enough strength to start the first step. It is not unlikely that you drop from it few time only to come back and start from the beginning with more and more agony. After few such false starts, something changes and the product that you need
to produce starts taking shape. If it is a document, you are pounding away. You are not typing one sentence and staring at it for 10 minutes only to discard the document and start afresh. Also, some coffee may help. So, you
take a break too. No, here you are producing at best. You are not able to type as fast as your brain is cranking out ideas. You may end up doing a marathon writing session. It is not unusual to see people 'in mood' not leave their
chairs for hours. At the end of one such session, you would see that you have accomplished a great deal. The product seems to have become something we can continue to evolve further without frustration or lack of ideas.

How did it happen? We do not ask this question many times. It is important to dissect this process once at least so that we can capitalize on the insight we develop. If we have to sum up the experience in one sentence, it is TIME.
More time you allow ideas to ferment in your subconscious mind, better work is produced. So, take your time. Start as early as possible to give yourself enough false starts. In way, there are not false starts at all. They are your
attempts to get fermentation start on the best footing possible. If you produce something under pressure, you will not have the luxury of fermenting your ideas, you may just get back the mixture next day without any flavor or
content. Your work does not produce "kicks".

We have to always remember 'slow and steady' wins the race. Has the topic gone from boredom to something
else? Not really because many times our boredom is closely related to certain specific tasks that we must accomplish. Unfortunately the task that we have to accomplish does not come to us naturally and it is not one of our core
strengths. In the same time it is also not something that we can not do. It is one of these things that we all have such
it-is-not-my-favorite-but-I-know-I-can-do-decent-job-if-I-apply-myself kind of task. We all have had subjects that we did not like in the school. Nevertheless, we passed and in some cases, we may have also excelled. Same here.

One thing that may help is to pay more attention and apply more concentration to things that do not come to us naturally. This will help us detect pit-falls early and consciously. This will enable us to guard against dropping the
tasks that we have begun. This may not make it any less painful. But, we will probably remember to come back and pick it up where we left off after 15 minutes of break rather than 15 days of hiatus.

Cheers!
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Posted by Mahesh at 6:34 PM EDT
Updated: Saturday, 17 June 2006 2:04 PM EDT

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